So....

I was laying next to my number one girlfriend last night and I had my hand up her shirt. Not grabbing her boobs as you might expect (if you didn't know me), but instead I was gently pinching each rib. Sounds kinky doesn't it?

I was giving her the Push10G's official bodyfat test. My fingers are actually finely calibrated bodyfat calipers. I moved down each rib until I got to her love handles.

Now what else would I do... I mean I love this woman, but...

[SQUEEZE]

Hell hath no fury like a woman who has just had her love handles measured and documented. I'll just let her fume for a while until she's ready for some calorie-burning make up sex. Maybe I won't "accidentally" stick it in her pooper this time.

'Sup Sluts

So one of the pussy magnets on my airplane was deferred today. There are 2 others in the triple redundant system, so we were legal to dispatch, with a few procedural caveats. Instead of sitting in my wool covered 3 axis adjustable pilot seat (with double adjustable lumbar support) while passengers boarded, I instead stood at the entrance to the aptly named cockpit and greeted women as they boarded.

It's interesting how people in different regions of the country and world make eye contact and greetings when they are boarding, versus when they are departing. But 'eh, who cares what is going through their minds. All I know is that I get to look at asses when they are boarding and tits when they are exiting.

When they're getting off, it's the MILF's that hold eye contact with me the longest and then make no false pretenses when they scan my well-tailored uniform up and down, often pausing once or twice along the way. I just smile and reciprocate. The younger ladies just look nervous and seem to stare at my crotch so they don't have to make eye contact.

Like I said, only one of the pussy-magnets was deferred. The other two are more than enough.

Giggity Giggity